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Matrimonial Issue Struggles: A Desperate Plea for Help Amidst a Cascade of Challenges

Frequently Asked Legal Questions and AnswersCategory: Family IssuesMatrimonial Issue Struggles: A Desperate Plea for Help Amidst a Cascade of Challenges
KM Khazi asked 12 months ago
Sir/Madam, Under the circumstances and humiliation that i am facing post marriage, I am forced to bring the following Matrimonial Issue for justice:Matrimonial Issue facing post marriage1) I belong to Muslim community and married with the permission and on agreeing upon from both the families on 18.2.2013 at Karnataka.2) Later its shocking to know that she (my wife) cannot even recite "Quran", Never performs namaz , not even Eid and Jumma. Then to make her read quran, i have asked maulana to come daily and teach her  deeni taalim, quran and basics of islam at my house.Before marriage itself on inquiry her family members told us that she can recite quran even "Hadiya" has also done and never skips namaz. Her parents could have informed but they preferred to hide the fact.Before marriage, If I was knowing about her inability to recite Quran and Namaz, I would have never stepped into thier house. Because its a very serious issue to me, but still tolerated !!!!3) Next issue started with regard to cooking, to start with she was unable to prepare even tea/coffee. With lots of support and help, she started cooking but tasteless, unhygienic, burnt, sometimes with bad smell and taste.Many times she do not cook for anyone even to children and my mother. Ever since marriage not even a single festival (Eid) celebrated at home.On many occasions burnt her hands, cut her fingers while cooking. Once she opened Pressure cooker while cooking, spilling the curry to the top of the roof. By the grace of God nothing has happened.Continuing with this issue it's too hard to digest that the Wastage of food she makes is intolerable. 4) After marriage, she often went to her parent's house and used to stay there irresponsibly for long times.  Few of the such visits that I remember in this Matrimonial Issue are, 2013  June/July  1 months Nov/Dec  2 months 2014  April/ May 2 months Dec 20days 2015  March /April 1 month 2015  May to Feb 16  10 months (First Kid deivery) 2016  Oct to Dec  2 months 2017  Feb to Mar  1 months 2017  Aug to June 18  11 months (Second Kid deivery) 2018  Oct to Nov  2 months 2019  April to May/June  2 months 2020  Sept to April  7 months 2021  Oct to Dec  3 months 2022  Oct to March 2023 almost  6 months 2023 Aug to Sept 1 month father expired 2023 October 15days chehlamTOTAL: 54 Months ( more than 4yrs)5) Also, she used to threaten that she will kill oneself and her attempt to die by suicide was thwarted many times. Such attempts include, (a) tried eating mosquito coils. (b) tried jumping along with kid from the moving car. (c) tried to strangle her neck. (d) threatened to poison children and self. (e) Ran many times along with kid in bare foots saying will not come back,6) The way she maintains house is really pathetic. Dirtiest every where, several times it was told to maintain cleanliness but all in vain. Condition of kitchen if anybody sees will never eat at our home. Everywhere cockroaches, lizards, ants, dust, dirt, rotten food, etc. Really I feel ashamed to say it's my house, because of this I never invite any of my friends or relatives to my home. On few occasions myself and my mother fell ill due to food poisoning.Such incidents include found fried lizard while eating kebab. Cockroaches, spider, ants, etc found in food many times in this Matrimonial Issue.7) Highly arrogant and commanding in nature, but talks very softly and nicely to others. Extent of arrogance is very high with children, beats children frequently. Even she disrespects my mother, and talks very rudely to her. On many occasions slapes door on my face, threatened to kill oneself and locks herself in a room after confrontations.8) Her life style is very peculiar, sleeping time and waking up times God only knows. Spends full time in kitchen without bothering things that happen at home. Goes to bath at evening 7pm or at times 9 pm also, takes bath for more than one or one and half hour. One such instance that I remember when she took bath at midnight 12.30 am.9) Above all, approach towards children is highly unacceptable, she doesn't attend to the basic needs of children. Breakfast for the children,  school  Everyday it's never on time.10) These issues, confrontations, circumstances and the environment at home has directly effected my health, now I am suffering from diabetes and blood pressure. Even it has effected my professional career and growth. Further my mothers health is also getting deteriorated because of these issues.11) Education/ carrier / growth of children is also hampered because of her as she cannot take care of them properly, cannot send them to school, cannot assist children to do their home work, cannot guide them in any way nigh-ether for "Deen nor duniya".On 24th Sept 2021, we have called her parents and relatives to discuss these Matrimonial Issue Matters. On discussion her parents and all felt very sad and took her to their place to train her. After about 3 months on 29th December 2021 her brother brought her back and assured she will manage the things in future. She started the same things without any changes within 15 days.Further last year (2022) her brother requested me to send her to banglore to her sisters house to get trained for day today's activities. Further she also promised me that she will be back by 15 days within dushera holidays.On 4th Oct 2022 her brother took her along with kids to her native saying within four days her sister from Bangalore will come and taker to banglore for learning all day today's activities. But this time she least bothered about her promises and the responsibilities. Even after three and half months also she didn't bother to go to banglore. Surprisingly without my permission and presence she got my sons circumcision done at her native place. She is therefore guilty of breaching the custom, and damaging the matrimonial relation in this Matrimonial Issue. And the incidents prove that she use to continuously hurt the sentiments of me and my family members.My daughter has not attended school since 3rd October 2022 to 10th march 2023, for that also she is least bothered. That way my daughter's education both school and Arabic got hampered.12) I have made several requests to her father,  mother, brother, sister, brother in-law, uncle, aunt, etc to educate her for day today's home affairs but nothing has improved rather worsened.13) Recently this August 30th, 2023 her father expired after undergoing hip joint replacement surgery.14) Even after all these her anger, arrogance, disrespect and all has increased and every time she tries to provoke and start confrontations.  On 23rd September 2023, at around 10 pm again she started confrontations with me and made me to shout, resulting into seasure of my limbs, unconscious and increased blood pressure. Then my family members took me to Hospital, there undergone CT of Brain and advised admission to ICU for observation. Later came back to home at midnight 3am.Following this consulted Neuro physician, he advised for further investigations. Also instructed not to get stressed and over excerted, not go drive vehicle.15) Knowing all these on 30th October 2023 her brother Bilal suddenly rushed into my house with around 30 - 40 persons including local gundas at 6.30 - 7 pm without intimation or permission. That time I was outside and only women & children (aged mother, my nephew, my kids and wife) were at home. They all shouted, threatened and even manhandled me in this Matrimonial Issue. To my knowledge persons came here include 1. Brother 2. Brother inlaw 3. Maternal Uncle 4. Father 5. Cousin 1 6. Cousin 2 7. Mothers Uncle 8. Unknown person 9. Unknown 1 10. Unknown 2 11. Sister 12. Sister inlaw 13. Aunty 14. Unknown lady 15. Pahelwan local 16. Atleast 20 to 25 Unknown faces16) Thinking of all will set wright with time and she will learn things I have tolerated everything. But now looking back from day one nothing has improved, rather now she is impossible to handle. Her body language, attitude, behaviour, disrespect, adamacy and arrogance is too irritating, she doesn't even spare children and my aged mother.In view of all the facts in this Matrimonial Issue, I would like to state that neither she is qualified nor cabable of giving proper education or guidance to children, Neither she can take care of domestic issues nor other matters. Next, Neither she knows human values nor she is  materialistic. Neither she is homely nor social.Further I am losing fatherhood, love and affection of my children. In addition, academics of my children has hampered largely.17) Under these circumstances I hereby call upon you to state a) I have life threat as she and her brother has nexses with pahalwans/ rowdies. b) I am psychologicaly disturbed and feeling unsecured every time ever since that instance. c) My aged ailing mother every second facing torture, disrespect, agony, humiliation, etc. d) Kids every second tortured, beaten, threatens, abuses, to the extreme. e) Staying in fearsome environment and afraid of poisoning or attacking me or my mother. f) Afraid of kids future as she can't take care and not allowing me to admit children to residential schools. g) She is mentally torturing me by way of reporting everything in a exaggerated way to her brother. h) She tries to threaten me by way of calling her brother and telling him that I am torturing her. i) Also she threatens me of dowry cases, domestic violance cases and other cases as I am in Government service. j) She does not care for me, she does not listen to me, she engages in cruel behaviour, she is unfaithful, she is incompatible.If any thing happens to me or my mother, responsibility directly lies with wife, her brother and her sister inlaw.

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Kindly suggest me a solution to overcome theses Matrimonial Issue Matters.

Legal Consultation and Possible Course of Action in Matrimonial Issues

Introduction

In matrimonial matters, navigating legal challenges requires a strategic approach to protect one's rights and well-being. In fact, This article offers guidance to individuals facing complex situations in their marriages, based on a detailed case study.

1. Seeking Professional Advice

1.1 Consultation with a Family Law Attorney

When grappling with matrimonial issues, it is imperative to engage the services of a seasoned family law attorney. Moreover, These professionals possess the expertise to interpret jurisdiction-specific laws and provide personalized guidance on rights and available legal options.

1.2 Documentation

To build a robust case, comprehensive documentation is essential without a doubt. Gathering pertinent documents such as marriage certificates, medical records, and communication history (texts, emails) strengthens the evidentiary foundation and aids in presenting a compelling case.

2. Ensuring Personal Safety

2.1 Restraining Orders

In situations where there is an immediate threat to life, obtaining a restraining order is a crucial step. A family law attorney can assist in navigating the legal process to secure such an order, ensuring the safety of the individual and their family.

3. Exploring Alternative Resolutions

3.1 Counseling and Mediation

In certain cases, family counseling or mediation may be recommended to address underlying issues within the relationship. An attorney's advice can help determine whether pursuing these alternatives is suitable for the specific circumstances.

4. Legal Separation or Divorce

In instances where reconciliation proves unattainable, the consideration of legal separation or divorce becomes paramount. Furthermore, A family law attorney provides insights into the legal implications of each option, including matters related to child custody, alimony, and asset division.

5. Protecting Children's Interests

5.1 Child Custody and Support

Given concerns about the well-being of children, establishing appropriate child custody and support arrangements is crucial without a doubt. Meanwhile, An attorney specializing in family law can guide individuals through the legal process to ensure the best interests of the children are prioritized.

6. Safeguarding Financial Interests

6.1 Protection of Assets

For those worried about the misuse or disposal of joint assets, Furthermore, legal advice is invaluable. Attorneys can offer strategies to safeguard financial interests during legal proceedings.

Conclusion

While this article provides a general roadmap for addressing matrimonial issues, it is imperative to emphasize that the information herein does not substitute professional legal advice. Finally, Individuals facing such challenges are strongly encouraged to consult with a qualified family law attorney to navigate their unique circumstances effectively.In conclusion, Wishing all those navigating matrimonial difficulties strength and resilience as they seek resolution and move forward in their lives.
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